a sad love story (10 Feb 2006)

a sad love story...

Being in love...

Everyone has been in love, fall out of love, loved, unloved.
Rejections... are just unavoidable.
Appreciations are hard to gain, therefore bring regrets...
But once gained, happiness are not there to prove anything.

Loving someone who doesn't & won't love you till the end of the world, no matter what you do, how much you give & how good you are; he still chooses to love the other impossible one, who seems to be a loser; who wins in your eyes,
Loving someone who loves you a thousand times more than you do; sacrifies his everything, you can never repay only with money but still never stops offering again, again, again, & again because he only wishes to give you the best no matter how much he withers inside.

Loving someone you love but can never get. Loving someone whom loves you but you love not.
Which one will you choose?
Is there an equilibrium love in a relationship? If there is none, where should we seek real love where a loving couple who love each other can be together? If found, where should we seek a relationship without fears of insecurities, lies, & fake faces from the other half? Is it possible? Are there such love out there?

Love IS blind. It is blind when you really love someone, & it's not when you don't.
Love comes out of no-where. You neither know when nor how it started inside you, but you feel the chemistry inside yourself; your body, your heart. You feel happy. The world is spinning. Colors are all around. But that, is at first. What's left in the end, is sadness.

You can choose not to agree, but I wondered... if fairytales like Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, & Snow White happens in real life, what would be the Part 2 of the stories? Will all still ends with happy endings? Will there still be a story? Or would we listen about problems like princesses who doesn't know how to cook, in-laws who tortures, which leads to divorces or whatever things like that?

I, am human too. Unexceptional. I've been through a lot, but not yet enough. I love to love, but afraid to give, as I'm afraid to be hurt. So, I can never love again? Maybe it's my fault for allowing not the feelings to come & for things to happen. Or couldn't that be because I haven't meet the one worth to do so, or simpler, the only one I really love? I should wait & let time prove. But should I live to wait for something abstract? I kept running away that I am, I tell myself I'm happy, but at the end of the day, I realize I'm waiting for something I didn't know what. But if lying to myself is not the right thing to do, is the other the wrong way? No.

Love becomes a killer; when it is burried deep down inside two loving peoples' heart who can't be together, hoping that it'll be gone with time; ironically, when their love is actually more eternal than time itself. Love then becomes a poison that kills not only the alive, but also, as time passes by, the dead lovers who can never express their love to each other. What can be the scariest murderer when you can never see the invisible 'killer' nor put the blame on it even when you know it is only love that murders? How unfair is this life? How unfair is this world? I'm yet to see. WE are yet to see. So, wait. & experience...