Tuesday, January 16, 2007

October Holidays Puzzle Lessons (30 Oct 2006)

October Holidays Puzzle Lessons

I don't know what 2 say. I mean, I know. I do.
It's just that... there'r bits & pieces everywhere, like a puzzle.
& I'm trying 2 fix it now.
Yes, Now.

Perhaps this is how October ends. Maybe.. this is the conclusion?
What have I been doing?
There goes the play, then the holiday, then... here I m.

My God! My mind is a M.E.S.S.!
I know, I know. There r only small things. Really small. Not a big a deal.
O.K. I'll start. 1 by 1.
Here it goes...

I've had a 1 week holiday. I'm still in it. & "10x" 2 God, it'll end 2mrw.
Well, I've had the simplest but heartiest holiday... I stayed at home; back in my hometown, NO more condo-isme, &
- 'great~!' 2mrw I'm goin' back 2 'Lonely City'.
Anyway, this time I had a better 'home-holiday' cuz I'd analysed my life & it seems better than b4.
Mayb it's bcuz I'm a lil' more grown up.

Or mayb it's this.
I don't know whether I should tk tis in2 consideration... but after doing the "3 Fat Virgins" play, I kinda changed my views on some things.
My social life, my views 2wards my course, friends & coursemates, & 2 acknowledge the fact that some ppl vf power use it 2 make unreasonable things reasonable bt I can only a-c-c-e-p-t. 'Take it, if U can't take it, leave it!'
I don't understand how it happens, but I realized that I bcame more... open.
Some words changed in my dictionary:

Swallow => Accept
Fakers => Still friends. Just say 'Hi', it won't harm.
Friends => There r real & fake ones. (B careful)
Love => ?

Speaking about love, here is a story.

Sub-Story: (Optional - Read OR Skip; kinda long)

I was eating at Orange (an eating place nearby college) vf my coursemates & a lec after the last Career Management class.
1/2 way through eating, a bunch of Korean guys came in speaking their language
'~!@#$%^&*&^%$#@!~'. I can easily recognize that as I'm crazy about learning that ~!@#$%^&*(&^%$#@!~.
They sat next 2 our table...
O.K, I admit I ogled. Hard 2 avoid that when a bunch of hunks dressed up in Adidas jackets & caps vf their styled high-lighted hair.

I didn't really ogle, I just glimpsed. So I didn't c them clearly.
The 2nd time I glimpsed, I saw a guy glimpsed back. He was in a really green shirt & cap + a white Adidas jacket. But he was the only 1 who looked Malaysian 2 me.
I was NOT flowing electricity in2 his eyes, I was glimpsing at the other fair, glowing skin hunks. (He is dark, really not like a Korean)
But, I supposed that he thought that I was doin what he was doin. & I m pretty sure he thought I was Korean by the way I dressed that particular day, I think.

So, fine.
After some chatting & me making sure that he WAS lookin at me, we just left.
Then this FAT, INDIAN, SECURITY GUARD vf his BALLOoONed stomach blocking the small side gate doubted if we r college students.
Me, as usual showed him my card reluctantly & shouted 2 his face:
"Y r there ppl like that in this wOrld?!"
& walked off!.

So I was
~!@#&*$#@!~ all my way as I walked back 2 college. My friend, Joy, is bhind me. So when I was ~!@#$%^&ing, I turned my head back & saw something bright green.
Yup, It's him~
I switched my head straight front & went like "O.. My.. God..! He followed me?!", 2 myself.
But I just kept my cool & walked.

Instead of following my frens up the lift, I went 2 photocopy something 4 class.
& I was right indeed, he followed me vf his other friend.
I felt really weird! & thought he was indeed brave!
He almost went in2 the book shop whn I was about 2 come out. Shocked, he turned away.
I went 2 the photocopy shop. Same thing happened.
I think he had an urge 2 tell me something. So I went 2 buy bubble tea.

He came 2 me, very s-h-y, & asked "Can U gv me your number?"
I was -> -.-""""""
R there such ppl in this world? Cuz I nvr met 1!
So I said, "U gv me UR' number." & passed my hp 2 him.
He looked kinda surprised & I suppose that's bcuz every girl gv him their number straight away just bcuz he is K.o.r.e.a.n.
Not in MY case.

He pretended 2 buy a bubble tea 2, Strawberry. (Cute, huh~) ;p
He kept waiting 4 me. When I 1 2 leave, he asked me 2 'yum cha' vf him & his friend.
I hv 2 wait 4 the photocopier 2, so I stayed.
We talked, chatted, & yah, he gt my number~
Ok, its bcuz he is a foreigner, ok? It's 4 friends purpose. He is not my type.

When I went 4 class, he kept msging me. I think about 8 in 1 hour. Keep in mind that he's in class & so was I!
He said he MUST date me b4 I go back 2 Johor 4 a holiday.
-P/S: I just broke up vf my 2nd bf a day b4 I know this guy. & I've always longed 2 own a Korean bf.
After class, I went 4 my hair treatment at the Carrefour at Kesas, dropped by my aunt's house, thn went 2 Pyramid alone, bought a bag, etc.
I felt lonely. I just don't know... I mean, it would b 9s if that man cld accompany me but... I rather not.
So, I reminded myself what it's like 2 b alone again aft keeping myself company 24/7 when the play was goin on. & mind U, it's NOT fun!

I went back home. Sat down, & think. While browsing 'Friendster', my hp rang.
Yeah, U know who~
He asked me if I cld come down & meet him outside the condo & so, I did. (Mayb the result of loneliness b4; I hv no idea~)
I was wearing a petite dress & using the new fury bag I just bought & he thought I looked 2 9s 2 just stand downstairs & talk 2 him so we went 2 'Ming Tian' 4 a drink. His other 2 Korean friends came 2 & they drink.
I knew bout this Korean drinking & smoking habit thing & while listening 2 their
~!@#$%^&, my mind was reading their culture, recalling what I saw in dramas & my 2 visits 2 Korea b4.
It's really the same thing!

U know, this guy, as my brother said, is a dog from Korea.
What he said was pretty true; in every country, there is a 'dog' & there we hv 1 in our country.
Just after knowing him 4 1 day; & less than 24 hours as I minus the hair treatment time, he confessed 2 me.
Yes, the same night.
I thought he was drunk, so I ignored him.

The next day, day after, day by day.
He got drunk everynight, msg & called me; I don't rmbr how many times, reciting that he miss me like crazy, ol' that crap...
-What the hell is going on?-
I mean, it's only 1 day. I only know him 4 1 freaking day! & he said he love me.
This, is 1 of the "Hard 2 Handle Men" in my list. I swear!

He got angry each time I reply his msg late or when I din know what 2 reply & ignore them.
He got angrier & angrier.
He said bye.
So I said bye.
His anger got worst!

Yesterday, he called me back.
He 1ed me back.
I think its bcuz I'm goin up 2 KL again.
& 4 ur info, he had 15, yup~ one five gfS b4.
He is nth but a d**. I'm SORRY!

I told him 2 stop.
Ops... I did it again!

He went on like he 1s 2 meet my family, he is willing 2 study vf me at Australia (though he has no $ his parents does), yada yada...
In my heart, I thought, Yes, this is the type of guy I, I like. I WANT. I'm gonna 5d 1.
Nvr think much & just do it. C'mon, it's just my style. What can hold U bk if U'r TOTALLY in LOVE?!
But his rushing bit, forcing bit...
His desperation pushes everything away since the 1st sec I knew him.
No way~

Well, what can happen?
He will meet some other chick 1 day, & there the routine goes again~

A real guy friend of mine once tell me; a guy who will still be ur friend even after U reject him is a true guy in his love 4 U.
I experienced many of the opposite & got confused. Very confused.
But this holiday, I came back, meet some friends again, & think.
He is right. The love(s) is / r always still there, till now.

Rmbr the "-P/S:" thing?
I felt as though that God set us 2 meet in purpose. He is 1 of those who is fated 2 pass by my life. But a "Ca-le-fei".
I broke up vf some1 1 day, & the nx day, I kinda met sthing which I dreamt of having, a Korean guy.
& the result is that I m imtimidated by them now. 10X 2 God, I learnt a lesson.
Chinese guys r WaAaAyYy~~~ better!
Even if they don't treat U like a Queen, it's still a Princess service~!

Back at home. - I recognize something.
*EeyYekK* *PiAnG* *KnocK* *rINg* *'ChEh~'*
These sounds... I tell U...
They really sounds like the screeching of cat claws on iron bars or chalks across blackboard.

I've analysed this for years & had a conclusion.
For yearSSSSSS SSSSS, (Yes, 11 S for 11 yearS), this ritual has begun.
-I m studying in my room, or resting in my room, or changing in my room,
either 1 of these sounds came 2 me, its 2 ask me 2 start studying, study harder, or a scolding.

*EeyYekK* - The sound of surprise door opening. (without a single knock)
"Cindy! What r U doing? R U studying?!"

*PiAnG* - The sound of glass / plate breaks or almost breaks.
"Cindy! Come get ur' own drinks / food. I helped U 2 save time by bringing food 4 U so if U don't study, U'll 'know.'"

*KnocK* - The sound of some1 knocking my locked door. (Normally around 10.30 p.m - 12 a.m)
"Cindy! U asleep? Open the door! I m asking U 2 study! Not sleep~"

*rINg* - Telephone rings.
"Cindy! Phone! Don't talk 2 long, rmbr ur studies! Or I'll ask ur friends 2 stop calling by MYself."

*ChEh~* - My bro calling me from somewhr.
"Cheh~, eat!!!" - & either b4 of after dinner, the study thing will pop up. Like:
"Quick finish ur' food, then go study. Don't b slow mo!"

So U see, until now, I never have 100% P-E-A-C-E in my house, or even my own room.
Y? Cuz I'm traumatiZe!
Now, that's still O.K, but in the bathroom...
Whenever I hear any of this sounds, I freaked out!
Either I hv 2 rush out vf shampoo on my hair or soapy body (& I hv 2 change another towel), or scream my lungs out 2 ask what's it they 1.
I m always in fear.
I don't know Y & how 2 stop this from goin on...
I've grown up...

Mayb tis is Y I talk 2 my parents in a kind of tone...
Mayb its a revenge or "Y-did-U-mk-me-in2-this" thing kinda thing~
I doN'T 1 2 treat them so! But _____

These days, I thought I can ZzZz earlier & 2 lie down on my cosy bed, do nothing, rest, & think.
But surprisingly, I din 5d the time 2 do so...
Till 2day; the last day I'm goin 2 b at home. & its only for like... 3 minutes?
I lay down there, listened 2 Shayne Ward's No Promises, & think.
& I'v learnt that it's not wrong 2 spare time like that!
I'v been running away 2 do so bcuz I was trained not 2 waste time. But great thoughts & sollutions come when U stop running away & face them vf ur brain!

Sub-Story 2: A Dream

Rmbr the dream bout Jack Sparrow? Yesterday, I had another dream. Not very long, don't worry. lolz~

I became famous. FINALLY!


I got a contract 2 bcome a singer. So my "jing ji ren" who is a woman in specs arranged a dinner 4 me vf some other artistes as a start.

& GUESS WHO???!!!



Jay is driving. Hebe is sitting beside him. & they r NOT a pair. Just best frenz, but ppl just keep makin' rumours about them.
My jing ji ren & I sit behind. I think it's a black Vios. Can't really rmbr but it's kinda wide inside.
I feel very contented, eXcited!, but remain my cool. I keep smiling 2 myself & inside my heart.
The 3 of them start talking & so I join. & our conversation just get hotter & hotter!
We get closer 2, & know each other better.

We go round a brightly lighten roundabout, go through a small route, & then!
We reach a street. It's not like China Town or the streets in China or Taiwan, but its very... cultural. Chinese-ly.
There r white paper lanterns vf red chinese words on them & the whole 1 street is lighten uP.
Very beautiful. I m amaze & very eXcited. They r all shops selling FOOD! Chinese food, of course.
Jay gets frustrated bcuz he & we don't know how 2 mk up our minds. He slows down the speed as the car strolls along the street. We browse every shop.
I c a noodle shop which looks quite interesting whr the old man / woman who is cooking wears a chef's hat.

Anyway, we finally end up in a shop & start 2 enjoy our food.
I m observing Jay more than the food. He looks so "diao" when he eats.
So natural.
I know I'm not, & trying 2 b as polite as possible, & it doesn't even mk me look more pro after all.

Time 2 go home.
My jing ji ren & I live 2ghtr at a not very 9s apartment; sharing vf some other ppl.
I m thinkin bout Jay & what he did that shows signs that he likes me.
ALL RIGHT~ It's only a DREAM!
But that's still the 1st thing I did when I opened my eyes this morning.
So glad I dreamt of Jay. -.-"

Back to real life.
I m going up 2 KL 2mrw. Back 2 Sunway, the condo, Roof Top Theater, bla bla bla.
I know it's not easy 4 me 2 build that 'like' feeling 2wards that place but it's even harded 4 me 2 not hate it.
No choice. Better choose love than hate, right? -.-"
Well... U knw... it's just that, I love my home! I don't feel like it's time 2 leave YET!
U can say it will never b time then, but I... don't think so! >.< *=..( *sob sob* What can b better than this? I hv my family here, my room which is my paradise (who wld 1 2 leave his / her PARADISE no matter whr it is? Will U?), my friends (my true frenz who brighten up my life), everything! What do I hv there? No family, shitty room full of DUST even aft I clean it 10 times, the toilet vf hairs clogging the drain (just like the scene in horror movie), the unavoidable laundry story, so on, & so on... :( How can any1 possibly b happy there? It's not only that sch reopens, but the nightmare of the condition of ur' habitat! Now my greatest wish is 2 bring my whole house up next 2 college!!! Fine~ Not a viable option. What I missed above r friends. I do hv them, but... I don't. Great~, I'll hv 2 change. "Be an event planner rather than waitin' 2 b invited." Ya right~ Watever I do, I'll just keep in mind 2 b happy & safe at d same time. & I've vowed 2 sleep EARLY. So I hv 2 stop NOW. Looks like this girl here finally finished fixing this puzzle. Except for the missing pieces; She'll hv 2 5d a way 2 solve it herself.....