No Pain No Gain Lah horrr?!

i've been going to the gym for (only) two days now and my muscles hurt like HELL. from:

bending down to brush my teeth,
to buckle up my bra,
turning the steering to park my car.

climbing up or down the stairs,
basically just walking (i can't run),
SITTING! because my cheek bums' muscles stings.

forget about using the toilet.
squatting, or sitting;
they're both apparently impossible now.



all for the sake of getting back my once flattering flatter flat abs.