Today you wake up with a pocket full of sunshine. You see the people you love, and the people who love you too. Everyday you wake up to see this beauty. Can you measure how much you treasure all these chances?
Sometimes, you scold your kid when they misbehave. It's not funny you don't go around scolding random kids because you don't love them, and you don't have to.
But one day, someone you know decided to leave their daughter, Amy, with you for the weekend. Amy threw her Barbie at your son, Jason. Jason naturally fought back. Amy cried for mummy.
C'mmon... We all know that you would not possibly scold lil' "guest" Amy who doesn't belongs to you, will you?
So now you have both Amy AND Jason howling -after you scorned at him. Who is that you're suppose to love again??
You entered the Zone of Pride having someone else's trust instead of staying true to what matters more close to your heart.
If I have children one day, I will make sure that all the spaces in between our relationship are filled with hugs & kisses till the day I leave.
When I was younger, I wished my parents good night, and they all ended with a kiss.
Today, I wish my parents good night, and it all ends with good night.
I can't remember when this tradition gone stale, but I know I was never trained to show love using neither actions, nor verbs. I'm afraid our egos has actually grown bigger than our heads or the pure love inside us, as we grow up as individuals.
I open my eyes in bed every morn saying to myself, "I'll call mum today. I promise."
But I never. I am always too busy.
When I finally get time to scroll my facebook phonebook, I remember again the cartons of broken promises I've ignored. This time, I make a new promise to end the conversation with the 3 words before I hit "call", but it never fails to end with an awkward goodbye instead.
I have always been a coward.
Why afraid to show love when they are only my own parents who ask for nothing in return? Why is it so much easier to say "i love you" to my 2 ex boyfriends whom I had commitments to?
Have you ever faced the same thing?? Can you tell me; have you changed???
I'm now sitting outside Gleneagles Hospital writing this on my TouchCruise. The sentence
"If I don't ever see you again, please don't despair and take good care of yourself. Don't make us worry."
rings in my ears sempiternally in incessantness.
How short is one life? It is, really very short. You'll never know when is too late.
Today you wake up with a pocket full of sunshine. You see the people you love, and people who love you too. Everyday you wake up to see this beauty. How much do you treasure all these chances? Do you know; can you measure?
To all the smokers out there,
Smoke. And look at yourself. Smoke. And think again. Buy that box. You can still afford to pay. Pay for the sticks. You love you, but you can afford to feed your lustful addiction that screams, "Tar! Tar!!!".
I'm sitting outside the hospital's garden because it's freezing inside. I'm here to enjoy the glorious sunshine and the whispers of the wind to put my worries at bay, but to my DISMAY, everyone is here to cig -taking advantage of the generous breeze as a factor of cause to replace my troubles by painting my ONLY two lungs black with nicotine.
I hope you are the next one lying here on one of these white hospital beds; wishing you can turn back time but it's too late.
Still can't possibly feel sorry for yourself? This is how you look like in your black coffin your father bought for you in dolorous grief.
You are dead. As dead as your last cigarette butt in that ash tray I just drenched with my spat of phlegm.
Any smokers CAN quit in ONE day. "You musttt be joking!", you say?
Well let's see. Mostly ALL criminals smoke. Let's say Najib, the murderer slash smoker was found guilty for killing Aminah. He was sent to jail for the rest of his life till the day he dies "naturally". Obviously, that means he COULDN'T buy any cigarettes forever!
Do you think he could still survive? Or would he die now without the fag sticks? Because despite the haggard unshaved face and excessively mushrooming ingrown hair, I see him living a so much healthier life now for the next 10 years! So, doesn't that conclude:
ANY Smokers CAN Quit Smoking in ONE Day
&
Not DIE?????!!!!!
If there's a will, there's a way. You want to give more excuse(s)? Can't read ingerish? -Di mana ada kemahuan, di situlah jalannya.
If you don't love yourself, at least love the people around you. Give our respective organs and worth-cherished life the amount of RESPECT they need.
Remember the story of how you would have scolded Jason instead of Amy?
I hope I'm not the only one too vain to shout at the TOP world at the TOP of my happy lungs:
"I love myself!", and I am glad my parents don't smoke. ((:
p/s: please do feel free to continue the "8 Ghosts of Honor" survey. i'm giving it a 1 week's time life span to decide, i think... between Number 3, & 6?? Both posts come with pictures, and all EIGHT posts will come in time.
Hey~! What is NOT a matter of time anyway? Let me remind you again, that DEATH is certainly IN the picture! Say "Tak Nak!" ;)
cindy, oh, cindy,
ReplyDeletei wish...
i have the strength to tell people to stop smoking. at least to the one that I LOVE.
as time goes by, i've became very tired and started to ignore them while they are doing their 'lung therapy' kinda thing...
I dont know why, i guess, maybe one day, I(the second hand smoker) am already dead because of them, they'd oni realise... perhaps? hahahahha... i don't know wtf am i crapping.. sounds so negative right wtf!
anyway... your this smoking post reminds me of something though...
dear eri peng .net, i'm sad to hear that u have given up. but i ALSO understand why is it so.
ReplyDeletei don't ALWAYS tell people to stop smoking, but i'm getting TOO SICK about this.
u were not crapping; but u said so because someone u love smokes too -& that's where the irony kicks in. It wasn't negative stuff u're saying; it is true that it's MORE dangerous for us second hand smokers.
Until today, i still can NEVER understand why can't people STOP smoking for the people they LOVE & THEMselves.
Lame. How can you say you love somebody when u don't even love YOUR self??? You know how?
& btw, what does this post reminds ya of? ;D
lol...second time voting, question no.6! i have the feeling no.3 'blowjob' is shisha. ehhehehe.
ReplyDeletei also used to wished my parents goodnight with a kiss, when i was a kid. it gradually stop when i grew older. this is just normal. we're asian. and most asians are not physically fond with their parents once the children grow older.
dear suz, yea... i get what u mean. just feel a bit sad that i couldn't recall when it all stopped. )=
ReplyDeletedear cindy.. so many times have i wanted to hug my mum n kiss her gudnite..but cant really understand wut was so hard to actually do it.. mayb we should all try to do it again.. im sure our parent will really appreciate it..
ReplyDeleteabout d smoking thing..i totally agree wit u about d smoking part.. its fine if they do it in a small compartment away from other ppls breathing space.. d worst are those who smoke in front of their children.. i mean kill urself if u want to but why d small innocent children...
oh ya.. i saw u last thursday at beauty & d beast..ur even more beautiful in person..
such a long comment..hehe...take care
It's good you realise. Not many people do.
ReplyDeleteout of 100 smoker, i think there's only 10 could stop, or even less, not every people like my dad, could stop smoking for the sake of family although he's not a heavy smoker.
ReplyDeletei did advice my friend to smoke, but they won't listen whatever u had done. most of my friend i'm hanging right now is smoking, i wish i can slap their cigarette hanging on their mouth, i guess leopard won't change its spot.
i'm really frustrating with those bloody smoker, u go mamak and see, for sure u will inhale 2nd hand smoke
TO smoker:GO TO HELLLLL
Dear stephan, i think we should all really try do it again.. but i don't know. a force so strong is holding me back. i think its eerie to show love to own parents. i don't. understand. WHY!?
ReplyDelete& smoking in front of own children... that's just so bad. if i were the child, i would most probably think twice if i should hug or kiss them good night. cuz they don't seem to show they love us?
i wish u had approached me & say hi @ the musical night! i couldn't remember if i had realized u noticed me. )=
Dear michelle chin, it's either they are just simply ignorant, or they really don't see things. @@
Dear alex, 10 out of 100 is REALLY a VERRY small amount! How sad. Who created cigs anyway!? i wish i could slap their FACES till the fagsticks fall!
well.. smoke really bad when get smell of that.. this remind me when i was small age sit on my father car.. that time my father was driving n i was siting on the back for him when my father smoke i need to smell it n hisap that too.. omg i can't believe that make me feel very geli.. when young i dont like ppl smoke.. feel like smoke ppl very teruk la.. never feel how was the non-smoke was feeling de.. omg! can i have a green land with peace n colorful world?
ReplyDeleteI hate smokers too. Is another najib a smoker too? He is criminal too!
ReplyDeletespeaking as a smoker myself, i have to say: you are delusional.
ReplyDeletesmoking can't be given up in one day. it takes 28 days to kick a habit. and darling, it's a free country. i'm sorry if you get in the way of our smoke but it's our air too.
you pollute it JUST as much as we do with your car exhaust and hair spray so don't act like a victim here. you can condemn us to a life of cancer and disease, but at the end of the day, we know what we are doing.
we know the risks of smoking and we still choose to smoke. don't act as if you are saving our souls because it isn't any of your goddamn business. the smokers you encountered were smoking outdoors. not inside the hospital.
fresh air is for everyone. yes everyone. some of us use it, some of us abuse it. that doesn't give you the right to demand we not smoke in front of you. free country, darling.
dear anonymous..im sure nobody here meant to hurt ur feelings..i dont hate everyone who smokes..as u stated,its ur right.. but is it ur right to 'kill' others with ur addiction?? yes,addiction.. smokers much like urselves are ignorant to the rules..free country it might be but there are rules in place which clearly state no smoking in public areas, restaurants, shopping malls and various other places.. do u adhere to those rules?? so yes it is our 'goddamn' business because we dont care if u wanna die, but we do care dat ur distroying ours at the same time...
ReplyDeletesorry cindy...juz a bit upset at d previous comment...
sorry...about d comment that smoking cant be given up in 1 day...total BS... juz cuz u dont have d discipline doesnt make it not possible...my uncle who stays wit me gave it up in a day...he ate prunes and did other stuff to keep away from d urge to smoke again.. he had been smoking since he was 18..he stopped when he was 66.. so please..dun tell me it cant be done..
ReplyDeleteErr...hi Cindy!
ReplyDeletejust want to ask, do you know any part time photoshooting available around? I'm currently working full time, and I'm searching for part time modelling and photoshooting to occupy my weekends. any recommendations? any websites you know which I can browse in?
Thanks a bunch in advance!
Oh, & stay pretty! :)
gleneagles...
ReplyDeletepenang .....
anywayz woot finally got the taim to read blogs again wootness!!!
so..
whoz hospitalized for tarred lungs??
not u i hope...
help me!!! ive got 5 housemates and 3 of them smoke!!! around me!!
ps: WOOOT MICHIE CHIN!! UR ALIVE?!?!?!
ME TOO ME TOOO!!!
owh owh!!
ReplyDeleteI VOTE THE MALAYSIAN DREAMGIRLS THINGY!!!!
i didnt know ur in it.. or rather didnt know the show existed... till one day walked into my friends room n she was watching sumtin so i stood behind her.. watched.. (wah got bunch of girls in this show, so watch lar)
then suddenly.. this face looks.. kindddaaa familiar..
omg iz yew! tried to finish that episode but tak boleh tahan lar :P
too much drama!! and then my friend (whoz been followin teh series) tells me ur not the most favourite contestant (amongst the contestants). n i was like really arh? but shes hot lar.. the rest o the girls.. cannot make it lar hahaha :P so i bet u'd win and i won!
*SMOKING KILLS* - This is the warning that appeared in every fag's pack but it's very unfortunate that it doesn't stopped some persistent smokers. I reckon that they were in a hurry to enter the preliminary round to meet GOD. XD
ReplyDeleteas someone who has smoked in the past, i would consider myself very lucky cos i stopped before getting really addicted - which would make it hard for me to stop.
ReplyDeletei sometimes still feel the urge to smoke in certain situations, it really takes alot of self-control to refrain from taking that cigarette stick and lighting it up. u gotta give them some time and patience.
I would highly recommend my bf who smokes to read tis blog entry. I hope he understands. :) Thanks for writing such a wonderful piece.
ReplyDeletedear anonymous, i understand how u feel. )))=
ReplyDeletedear jam, "hahaha!!!" We'll see about that!
dear anonymous, you speak as if u own no brain. please grow up & understand that i'm talking about the BIG picture, not against You. Be a father/mother one day & encourage your children to smoke since the air is for everyone.
dear stephan, ignore him/her. its one of those stubborn, ignorant, bull which went off-track with his/her life & doesn't want to admit it, nor REFLECT!
dear julianimator, it's O.K if they love God more than themselves then. i would still love to choose see myself in the mirror longer, than going to a place no one sure exists.
dear nickosaurus-rex, Good For You man! time & patience, yes. but without discipline, they are nothing.
dear squirrelicious, i am glad that u could relate to my entry. please please ask him to stop smoking for him & u, & EVERYONE you both love! Good luck!!! ;D
Dear princes :)
ReplyDeleteI have the same problems.. I wish I can just "I love you" freely. I always ended up Mom! I'm going see you... I have the same thought as you since my dad passed away few years ago.. I never get to say how much i love him and I think I never did.
I was not raise from the family where we are so like "showing feelings freely" we are more like "be strong don't cry and don't show weakness"
I also tell myself, when i have my own kids, I'll try my best to do t eh best.
you look so lovely. hug hug, always enjoy looking at your smile :) muck!
dear netster, i'm sorry to hear bout your father... )=
ReplyDeleteWell, we should try our best to not make the same mistakes our parents do. that's a must. Gambateh!!! :DDD
I am a smoker. And I have quit a grand total of 7 times over the last 13 years. You can't stop in a day, at least in my case. I did it in two. My longest period without smoking is 14 months and shortest is 4 months. I picked it up again and again is not because I'm addicted to it. Also not because of peer pressure. Definitely not because of the fact that I can afford it. I recycle stuffs. I don't have air conditioning installed at my home, instead I plant plants and make sure my home is properly aerated so that I don't need air conditioning. I take public transport to work everyday when I have a 3 year old Sentra that has only gone as far as 22000 kms. I can go on, but, why I picked up the damn habit is because if I, one person, tries to make an effort on the current enviromental changes and bimbos like you spray on stuffs on to yourself every single day, harming the enviroment. Bet you also don't know the fares of LRT, buses and stuffs as well. Of course, why would you need to know those stuffs when you can afford it easily enough. Over the years, I did my part. Did you? Even a day?
ReplyDeleteBefore any of you bimbos and bimbo lovers come to me about "you harm yourself for all that? Stupid".....
I just wanna say this: "I'll take my chances. Everyone dies, but, a bimbo who contributes, directly or indirectly to the climate change with all the nonsensical stuffs that she puts on every single day should be compared side by side with smokers. I mean, please tell me every single spray on stuffs that you bimbos buy, do you check whether it harms something at all, be it yourself or the enviroment. You don't"